I don’t think I’ve ever truly understood the whole concept of “turn the other cheek” until I met my husband.
I come from a long line of hot-tempered women. Both my mother & my grandmother are fighters. Thankfully my grandmother has retired from physically brawling, but I’m sure if she needed to protect a family member, she wouldn’t hesitate, while my mother is still able to dish out a strong cuss soup to anyone who crosses her path.
I was taught to fight. I was told to stand up for myself, to not be taken advantage of, and to not let others be taken advantage of either. As a child, I knew that if I got in a fight at school, I would have to win to show my face to my family.
When my girls and I started clubbing, I was the tough one. I would let every guy know that we were not to be messed with. Weighing a total of 100lb I would let my big ego size up anyone that questioned my insanity as my girls would encourage me from behind.
I’ve hit cars that almost drove into me, I’ve clothes-lined people on the metro who entered before I exited, I’ve walked through a crowd with elbows held out ready to jab anyone that didn’t move and I’ve checked into strangers like we’re in the NHL when they walked into me.
And then there’s my husband.
A few weeks ago, my husband was in line at the dépanneur (convenience store) and as he pulled out his cash, he dropped a 10-dollar bill. He bent to pick it up and as he came up, the guy in front of him turned around and reached for it. The man said that HE dropped it. He said that he had four 20’s and a 10. He proceeded to take his money out of his pocket to show my husband. A woman, who must’ve seen my husband drop his money, began to walk over. My husband shook his head at her and handed the man the money.
When my husband called to tell me, I was livid! I’m actually still pretty vex as I write this. That man lied! He stole my husband’s money! This is wrong!
Meanwhile, my husband is telling me to calm down. He continues to say it wasn’t worth the fight.
He simply turned the other cheek.
My husband has countless stories like this. Strangers & friends alike have manipulated him, robbed him and put his family in danger. And most of the time, he’ll let it go, forgive, and move on.
When I walk through the world, I see it as a place full of people out to get me. I was taught to carry this chip on my shoulder. Hence, all my public transit stories involve me being vex!
But when my husband walks through this world, he sees it as an opportunity to help, serve, and love. And all his public transit stories are a reflection of that: giving directions, lifting strollers, and carrying groceries.
I do believe there is a space to stand up for injustice. Just maybe not the way I’ve been doing it.